Holding and Creating Spaces Within and Without

I used to go on weekend breaks with a friend of mine. We went to a hotel to relax, chat, catch up on stuff and be pampered. Being a great water drinker, I used to carry my bottles of water around and used to suggest to my friend that she do the same. (Water in hotels is ultra expensive). She responded very interestingly which was it reminded her of her mother telling her to eat her vegetables.

What I'd said was obviously a trigger of being told what to do. She could obviously hear a nagging parental voice in what I'd said. She knew that she ought to drink more water for her overall health and well being, but couldn't bring herself to do because it felt like giving in to her mother's commands.

I got the message and shut up about the whole subject. What right did I have to tell her what to drink or what not to drink?No wonder she was annoyed.

Several months later we went away for a short break again. I noted that she was carrying water with her.

What is this all about?

My friend may have changed because I nagged her about drinking water. But what I think actually happened is that I held a place open for her to change. In the months between the two weekends away, she obviously had time to reflect and realised that she was hurting herself by not doing something that would make her feel better in order to get back at her mother.

However, I also let go of my need to tell her what she should be doing. I released the energy around this and allowed her to be who she was. This gave her the space to change.

We spend inordinate amounts of time and energy trying to change and control other people. That energy could better be used in living a life we love. We can't force or tell people to change and hope that they will. Well they might, for a short while, but it won't be sustainable, because it's not coming from their deepest desires. People need space to change and that space is acceptance of who they are and where they are now.

Growth and change happens in that space between activities. Holding that space within allows transformation within manifested without.

It's All About The Energy (Again!)

Following on from my previous post, what came to mind was an article I'd read in the Observer several months ago. A mother whose son suffered from ADHD was advised to be and act calm around him. At first she was reticient, her cultural background meant that she was passionate and high octane and what difference would it make if she changed.

Quite a lot as it happens.

She noticed that her son's behaviour calmed down as hers did. She was reluctant to admit it, but her behaviour was having an effect on her son and a detrimental one at that. In fact, losing your temper and shouting at a child with ADHD actually makes it worse for them.

But rather than focus on ADHD as such, what this illustrated to me is the pivotal importance of centering and maintaining your own energy and connection and seeing how this influences the energy of others around us.

We are all connected

Self help gurus and mystics often state that: "We are all connected". It is true. We may know this intellectually, but it isn't until we do the energy work that we actually feel the depth of that truth.

As I've been doing the energy work consistently and started clearing my energy on a whole bunch of painful issues, as my energetic channels have become clearer and clearer, I've noticed how this has impacted on the people around me and the way I approach and think about different situations.

Mahatma Gandhi once said: "Be the change you want to see". Wayne Dyer says: "When you change the way you look at something, what you look at will change".

It's very easy and very acceptable to blame others for our problems, but others are just a mirror of ourselves. You can guarantee that whatever we don't like in others is merely our movie projection as to what we don't like in ourselves. If we can clear ourselves of that energy from our field then that person's mannerisms or behaviour no longer have the ability to "press our buttons". In fact our feelings about them is just information and tells us what we need to do for ourselves.

It's All About The Energy

Just had a really interesting experience.

I was about to write this blog in an Internet Cafe and it was going to be about Energy Dynamics. How our own energy impacts on everything around us.

I was in an Internet cafe which I'd been in before - it can get fairly crowded, but the service is quite good. When I went into the cafe I didn't quite feel right, but still paid to use it for a certain period of time.

At the first computer I was on, I felt the sun in my eyes and was pondering whether to move or not - then the sound on the computer didn't work. I was hoping to listen to an online teleclass, but no such luck.

So I move to another computer, it starts to work, I'm starting to listen to the teleclass and then it just goes off. Just like that. I ask for help again and the assistant says: "What are you doing to the computer?".

I knew that he was right.

My energy was not good in that place. Although I'd used it before, today (Saturday) was a particularly busy day and I felt the energy of so many people closed in together with minimal privacy. It just felt overwhelming and I really didn't feel comfortable. He turned the computer off and told me to wait a while before turning it on. By this stage I'd decided to call it quits, my energy really didn't want to be there.

Computers are a particularly effective and fascinating mirror of our energetic state (as our other people, although we don't often realise this). Whenever I was in a high energetic mood, the computer would work seamlessly, if I wasn't then it'd stutter into life before working sporadically and then petering out.

So harnessing, focussing and centering our energetic state makes perfect sense.

I don't do food shopping unless I'm feeling grounded because if I do I end up spending more money. There has been research into financial decisions made where those in a good state of mind made better decisions than those who were not. This is quite obvious when you think about it and as Abraham Hicks point out, it is best to take inspired action - action that is taken when you are feeling good - rather than not.

And I've found this to be true. If I undertake activities in a certain state ie ungrounded, you can bet that I'll need to redo them at a later time. It really is all about the energy and learning how to quickly centre and ground yourself really does pay dividends, both emotionally and financially.